I am the “Before”

Blue vacuum cleaner

Blue vacuum cleaner (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The cords running from my VCR to my TV display themselves prominently and proudly; the dust bunnies under my desk have formed a dance club; the dishes are threatening a coup if I do not get a new dishwasher that works; and my vacuum cleaner says it will not sit out any longer to fool people into thinking I am going to clean, when I actually have no intention of cleaning.

 My life is being taken over by dishes, dust and unwieldy cord displays, and one very snooty vacuum cleaner.

I am the before picture. Before the house is cleaned.  Before it is organized. Before the papers are filed. Before the dishes are done (at least if I had a working dishwasher I could hide them—my dishwasher is now a storage unit). Before the vacuuming is done.

I used to write articles for a “home” magazine. There were no dancing dust bunnies at these homes. No cords of any kind showing. The dishes were not on the counter. The vacuum was nowhere to be seen. Children were seen but not heard.

These were the after houses. After the interior decorator had done his/her thing. After Molly Maid and all her cousins had cleaned it. After the family had been ushered out, not to return until the photographs were taken.

A few of the houses that were featured had some before rooms.  Rooms where the people lived with crushed pillows and throws thrown willy nilly, and cords showing. I think we should have photographed and featured these rooms. I think I may start a magazine that shows “before” houses. What do you think—would you read it? I would in the hope that some people live like I do.

Published in: on August 17, 2013 at 8:58 pm  Comments (38)  
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