Three Years Ago Today

English: Entrance to St. Augustine's Church un...

Snow Day: One Tree Hill. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Three years ago today: It was a Monday. There was a rain snow mix, and the roads were bad so no buses were running. How do I know this? Just ran across my daybook/calendar for 2010, and from the notes I made that day I am getting a sense that time moves on in some ways, and not in others.

It moves on in that in 2013 the fact that whether or not the buses are running for school is no longer an immediate issue in my life as both of my sons are now out of high school. One is at college, the other is in a rock band just waiting for his big break.

I had a council meeting penned in for that Monday night, February 22nd, 2010. Things have stayed the same on that front as I have a council meeting on the Monday coming up.I noted that the meeting was only an hour and a half long. That no longer happens, as the municipality has eliminated one meeting a month, so now the two meetings on the second and fourth Mondays run at least three hours. That is a lot of doodling!

I was working for a magazine at the time, as I notice a reminder telling me to write up the articles due for Our Homes. I no longer work at the magazine. It is a choice I made that I sometimes regret (miss the money) but mostly do not.

For some reason I did not make a note to write my column and write up council news for the newspaper. Maybe for once I did it ahead of time. But that is doubtful—I usually work to deadline and that means writing my heart out on Monday morning.

I made note of where my husband was working that day (as a contractor he works at a variety of places) and that my eldest son was at work. At the time he worked in the printing press of the newspaper that I write for. (Yeah, yeah, I know I am not supposed to end a sentence like this—don’t bug me Robin!) Times change–as he no longer works there.

I am supposed to call Salisbury—but I think that is a note for my husband as I do not remember who Salisbury is. I also have a note to  email Charlene. Charlene is in my Writers’ Group so I was probably supposed to tell her when the next meeting was, or the prompt we were supposed use for our writing for the meeting. Hard to say three years down the road.

So that was my day three years ago—which proves that some things change and some things stay the same. The weather today is very much like it was three years ago, except we are getting inundated with snow right now, and the mix is coming this afternoon.

And since I have to work in BLISS, as it is the topic of the year—I find it very blissful that I do not have a council meeting tonight—as the weather looks foreboding. The good thing is–I no longer have to worry about whether the buses are running or not.

So what are you finding blissful today?

~ Scary? ~

This is a film my son  made for a film competition at  college for Halloween.  He won the competition. As his proud mother I am sharing it with you. I really had to talk him into letting me put this on my blog, but he finally acquiesced.

The judging for the competition was not over until after Halloween, hence you are seeing it in November. November can be scary too.

This is the same son that I posted a picture of a couple of days ago when he was six. He is now 21. I thought it was funny. If you do not think it is funny, do not tell me. Any accolades will be gladly accepted.

Without further ado–I present the next Spielberg, or George Clooney, or Godzilla–you decide:

Published in: on November 7, 2012 at 5:35 pm  Comments (30)  
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Comforts ~ Day 12 Or Can I Type Through My Tears?

Governor General of Canada visits Victoria

Governor General of Canada visits Victoria (Photo credit: BC Gov Photos)

Today we start packing. Tyler, my youngest son, is going back to college a week early to get organized, meet his counsellor, and look for a part-time job. This is the third time he has left for school. The first year was hard, but I was excited for him. The second year was hard but I was glad he was continuing his education. This third year—it is still hard. But, nevertheless, I have found some things to be grateful for:

1. He has become an independent being, able to do his own laundry, cook for himself, and schedule his time. He is not perfect with all these things—but neither am I, and I have had more practice.

2. I will continue my tradition of  writing my little emails to him every day. The Governor General of Canada did the same thing when his girls were in post-secondary school, so I figure that gives me the freedom to do the same.  I know that the only responses I will get will be “meh”, or when I ask him to write back, he taps this little note to me: “back”.

3. I am grateful  that he is just on the other end of the phone and that I am one of his frequent ten phone pals (so not only is the call free, I take this as a sign that he “likes” me.)

I am happy that he is going to school – I truly am. And I know that at 21 it is not unusual for kids not to live at home—they have a whole world out there waiting for them. But I often wonder where the heck did the time go? One day they are trying to get a bird to land on their hand (oh, the innocence of little ones) and the next they are flying free themselves.

The worst part of this whole exercise is after we have helped him move into his home away from home. When we take our leave, he always stands in the driveway and waves at us until we are out of sight. This gets me every time (yes I am tearing up as I write this), but I have done it many times before and I will do it again.

Grateful thing number 4 just for today: I still have him home for two more days!

Published in: on August 24, 2012 at 12:58 pm  Comments (46)  
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Semi-Empty Nest Syndrome

empty nest syndrome

empty nest syndrome (Photo credit: butterfingers laura)

  “change does not affect reality on a deeper level”

The more things change, the more they stay the same was originally a French proverb. It means that change “does not affect reality on a deeper level”. This definition was provided compliments of Wikipedia, a source I once promised myself I would never use.  Once again, the wise adage, “never say never” comes to mind.

I am not sure I agree that change does not affect reality, at least superficially, if not on a deeper level.  Take my immediate home front for instance. This summer my youngest son is home from college, which changes the dynamics of home life for at least a few months.  I really love having him home, as things are much livelier around here, which is good thing. When he is gone during the fall and winter months, it is kind of quiet around here (I love quiet, but not too much quiet).  His older brother still hangs out here, but he is gone much of the time, so during the school year, we have a semi-empty nest. Why has no one written about this transition—the semi-empty nest syndrome—where the house is empty of children for a good part of the time, but this is still their major home base?

Adult children—most assuredly a conflict in terms, do come home again (spearing yet another hackneyed saying in the heart).  Just because “home” may change slightly over time, you can still go back there, even if it is in your imagination. To quote Sam the Weatherman on Good Morning America: “I am just sayin’.”

To copy that American comedian (Jeff Foxworthy) who has a whole stand-up routine based on “You Know You’re a Canadian When”, I am going to provide you with a few clues that will let you know when you are in a state of semi-empty-nestedness (which I define as that state wherein the kids who do not live at home all the time, come home):

1. You have to buy the 24 roll package of toilet paper once a week instead of once a month.

2. A package of eight hamburgers will no longer fulfill the needs of two meals.

3. You buy Creamsicles even though you like ice cream sandwiches.

4. You stock up on bacon and sausages and pizza, then realize you are feeding your (big) kid too many nitrites. Then you stock up on chicken.

5. You buy juice boxes for lunches.

6. You run the AC even when you would not run it normally. More bodies in the house equals more heat.

7. You have your own IT expert and lots of technical gadgets at your disposal that you have little or no idea how to use, but you look very tech savvy.

8. Laundry is not increased by onefold, but by tenfold—and you cannot figure out why.

9. Your upstairs (which is where the bedrooms are in my house) is in a state of flux, which every day you are meaning to get to, but by the end of July you shrug your shoulders in defeat and think, “Oh well, he is going back to school in little over a month” so you just leave it that way.

10. You enjoy conversations in the middle of the night—a time once reserved for sleep.

11. You find size 12 shoes and sandals at the back door, the front door and under the dining room table (at least at my house).

12. The bathroom has been taken over by a myriad of hair care products that have not found a home.

And last but not least, you have someone home who appreciates you, because they have had to fix their own meals, do their own laundry, and generally face the world by themselves for eight or nine months (except for phone calls home, emails or text messages and the occasional visit home).

Family life is an ongoing and ever changing entity – it is the ultimate shape shifter.  All we can do is hang on and enjoy the ride, bumps and all.

Published in: on May 22, 2012 at 2:33 pm  Comments (20)  
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