You Do Not Always Have to be Right!

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Yesterday, I read something that really makes me want to be a better person. I cannot remember if I read it on another blog or from a friend in an email or in a magazine ~ and I am not sure I remember it perfectly but it is this:

I am going to practice being kind, not right.

I think I may have paraphrased here, and hopefully not stolen it from someone. But I have been trying to practice this for the last few hours. I do not know how long my first foray into kindness and not having to be right will goโ€”but even if I fail, I am going to start all over again.

Seems so simple and it can make such a big difference.

What do you think?

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Published in: on August 1, 2013 at 1:29 pm  Comments (47)  
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  1. Lou, first of all, you are one of the kindest bloggers I know so I think you’re already doing this. “My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.” That’s a quote from the Dalai Lama. I know that when I’ve been troubled sometimes just a kind act from a stranger can make my day go an entirely different way. It does make HUGE difference.

    • Maybe you were the originator of the quote! That Dalai Lama really knows how say the most important things in just a few words. And you are so right–kindness can go so far….

  2. I so agree, LouAnn!. I’ve also heard a slightly different take on this and I try to make it my mantra: “I’d rather be happy than right.”

  3. Have you had any contact with other humans in the last few hours? I find that can be the difference between success and failure! Best of luck on your quest. Keep in mind, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. Am I right?!!! HA!

    • ha ha ha ha – falling off my chair laughing and yes I have had human contact–so far I have been good for 3 hours!

  4. Love that. It’s a good little aphorism to keep in your back pocket. I’ll try it out the next couple days and see how it goes!

  5. Laughing at the thought that you consider this your first foray…I think you already have this down…

    • you are sweet but I have to renew this vow every day, every hour, every minute — ha ha

  6. I cannot remember where I came across this, some years ago.

    โ€œIf there is profit to be made, let others have it; if you have an argument, lose.โ€

  7. I think you are always very kind :). Well, except maybe when you get grumpy about the mystery photo LOL!!

    • so give me one not to be grumpy about this week!

      • Hmmm, the one I have in mind……not so sure LOL! Don’t hate me because I like to challenge your mind :).

      • what mind? okay, the challenge is good–ha ha

  8. Lovely life philosophy! ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Kindness is a quality I value greatly..and it is one that can be used often when for example…we might feel another person is way off base but we don’t want to embarrass them so instead of ‘being right’ we utilize a little kindness…Diane

    • that is an excellent time to use kindness–I think people are kind to me that way all the time!

  10. And if you are kind (which is all I’ve ever seen from you), you are therefore right.

    • oh that is a good conclusion–I like that–you always put things into a neat nutshell that makes so much sense Heidi

  11. I do agree that kindness is the way to go. However, I think it is a victim of context as well. What is kind in one setting and in another? Is kindness correct here or is it empathy, or sympathy? I don’t know, just a thought.

    • yes I agree, kindness must stretch itself to fit the situation–and include the understanding that knows when to be empathetic or sympathetic,

  12. Someone once said to me, “Do you want to be right or do you want a happy marriage?”. That has stuck with me. I don’t always abide by it but like you, I try.

    • that is so true–sometimes I test it a lot– just cannot understand when people (John) do not see things my way–it is the right way after all! (lol)

  13. Well…I’m always right – LOL
    I like to paraphrase this quote when I’m wrong – I mean right – & others think I’m wrong – ๐Ÿ˜†
    Get Rich or Die Tryin’ –
    Bama: “Its like when I’m right I’m right, when I’m wrong I could been right, so I’m still right cause I coulda been wrong, you know, and I’m sorry cause I could be wrong right now, I could be wrong, but if I’m right…”

  14. I try to do the same thing every day! Being right is highly over-rated….being kind makes a difference.

    • I think the only person who cares about being right is us–others just care if we are kind–you are so right, being kind makes the difference

  15. LouAnn, you’d think that the wife of a pastor would be the soul of kindness to all. Well, I’m also bipolar with PTSD, so it doesn’t always work out so well… but I try, I really do!

    No one is truly “right,” anyway. Kind, yes. My friend Jan, before saying anything, asks herself: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind? Honestly, she’s the nicest woman I know. But then, I’m new to this blog! Peace, Amy

    • I think the best we can do is try–my kindness lasted almost all day, but I kind of broke around 6, so I had to start all over again–and I think that is what it is going to be–a bunch of starts and stops.
      Your friend asks some pretty darn good questions–no wonder she is so nice

  16. As most everyone has said, you’ve already got the kind part down so you’ve already mastered the hard part! I think a lot of times I try hard to be both kind AND right….. a bit of a conundrum but it can be done! That being said, I do think the effects of being kind last much longer (and can be much more satisfying) than being right.

    • I have noticed people don’t care if you are right, but care about how you treat them–but I do like being in the right which is something I have to work on as it causes some problems
      I like that you try to balance both–that is the best way to handle it if you ask me

  17. This is a paraphrase of a quote I like: “Choose being kind over being right, and you’ll be right every time.” Not sure who said it, but I agree…this is the attitude I want to have too! Another one in this same vein…”you do not have to attend every argument you’re invited to.” Love that! And good for you for making the choice to be kind. I’m sure you’re well practiced at it already! ~ Sheila

  18. I have a plaque by my desk with a picture of Lucy (from Peanuts) on it. It says something to the effect of: “I have never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.”
    That pretty much sums it up.

  19. I believe it is a wonderful practice to implement. Too many people feel they need to be right, quite often hurting others along the way.

    • and I am more than guilty of it

      • Why do I feel that you may be being just a wee bit hard on yourself LouAnn? ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • hey–no one said self-realization was an easy thing – (lol)

      • This is true. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  20. Imagine what a world this would be if everyone chose to live that way!

  21. Thank you for this wisdom. Glad I didn’t miss this pearl of kindness. Just think if we could just let everything be what it is. Think of the kindness that would automatically be gifted upon the world. I loved this post.

  22. I see this is an older post. Funny how it seems so relevant in today’s world, especially here in the USA where we just viewed the political conventions. This is one of those universal ideas that we should all follow and you are right… it is not easy. Here goes…..I will keep trying.


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