Family Life – You Gotta Love It!

The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet

The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.” ~ Harry S. Truman

Wise advice that I have learned the hard way. My sons are in their twenties. They are wonderful, kind, and considerate except when they are not. I live in a 1950’s sitcom world where the young kids are fresh faced and innocent, and the older ones always willing to lend a hand to mow the lawn or carry in groceries. In my little world, there is no discord. There are no raised voices. There are no arguments.

Cut to real life. I am just going to have to realize that real life has facets of my ideal 50’s sitcom life, but that is not always how things are. My youngest son came home from college for the Christmas holidays on Saturday, and on Saturday night, my husband and I were in the living room. Youngest son joined us, then oldest son came in and sat down. Then the cat came and laid on the floor. It was bliss. We were all warm and fuzzy, and all together. It is the way I imagine Christmas Day should be, but it happened on a nondescript Saturday.

I paused. I took note. And I enjoyed the camaraderie. I enjoyed having my family all in the same room, under our roof. It was cozy and we watched TV and snacked and joked. And I decided right then and there to enjoy the moment and not wish it away, or wish that it would happen at a prescribed time and place.

Since Saturday, there have been a few arguments, there has been a bit of discord–we are, after all, a normal family. There are going to be good times and bad. There are going to be warm and fuzzy times, and times with raised voices. I am just going to have to deal with the times that are not perfect, and recognize and enjoy those times that are.

Family life is not perfect~but I would not trade it for anything else in the world. (Okay a couple of million would be a nice addition but not instead of.)

Do you have some perfect and not so perfect family times?

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58 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I love the feeling of when you come in from a cold, blustery day and sit down on the couch with a blanky, a cup of cocoa, and my hubby. That is the perfect family day.

  2. It’s a rare day when we’re all together and everything seems blissfully happy in my family. Individually bliss can come and go, but as a family unit…? It’s more rare. haha! I’m always the first one to point out when things seem strangely perfect… maybe because it’s like the calm before the inevitable storm? My sixth sense gets activated! LOL!

    • I know all about family storms–that is why I enjoy the calm when it happens. Moms need a 6th sense!

  3. Family together, no matter what the occasion or for no occasion at all, is a thing to hold on to. Enjoy as I know you will.

  4. I feel such a sense of balance when college girl returns home. And yes, we all are normal.. discord and all. One minute they need us and then the next– well not so much. Wouldn’t trade it for anything. Although I am getting used to having the house all to ourselves– the visits are nice but the husband and wife aloneness is also quite welcoming.

    • I have to say I enjoy both–but find the transition a little disconcerting–

      • oh my yes..

      • ( i still have one at home so I don’t have a complete empty house– I am not a total empty nester– i am sure I will be crying in my cereal in 2 years)

      • I kind of have one at home, and one at college–the one at home is only here during the day

  5. I remember watching Ozzie and Harriet as a kid here in Aus. Perfect and not so perfect times at home? All the time. Best wishes over Christmas, Bruce.

  6. I loved that you could enjoy the evening and not simply wish that it could be like that every day or on a special day.

  7. I’m very glad you had that lovely family day. They are special and precious whatever the date upon which they fall. And, yes, good times and less good but without the lows would we appreciate the highs?
    All the best to you 🙂

  8. Even as our children are in their 40’s and married with their own families…although their children are grown and left home…there are still disagreements and difference in personalities which conflict sometimes…but I know they love each other and would defend each other to ‘outsiders’ a heartbeat….Diane

  9. The other night my wife and two daughters sat down together for the first time in weeks to watch some tv. Five minutes in, someone paused the tv to say something and we all just started talking, sharing, laughing, catching up. The tv was paused for nearly an hour. Utterly fantastic night.

    • and you just cannot plan that can you?

      • You’re exactly right. The best times seem to always happen when you’re not looking for them.

      • so very true!

  10. I love having all the children under same roof – I sleep better and get that fuzzy feeling as well. 😀

  11. How fortunate you are and I can tell you have a very warm and loving family!:)

  12. We have our moments of family harmony, but I think we tend more towards being like a combination of the Simpsons and National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation..

  13. I know exactly what you mean – lovely post.We had half an hour together in the nursing home yesterday – Ants, Ming and me – that was like old times. It wasn’t long before Ming got tense with irritation at Anthony’s confusion but until then we had a lot of laughs and it was wonderful.

    • we just have to recognize and capture those moments–we cannot make them happen–glad you had one yesterday

  14. I think those warm and fuzzy family moments just kind of sneak up on you and it’s up to us to recognize it for what it is. They are too fleeting and few (like in most families) so when they do happen, I always tell myself not to take it for granted and to be thankful. Our families can drive us up the wall sometimes but they also make us happy like no one else can.

  15. “Except when they are not”, love the honesty. Your family sounds lovely!

  16. My house is a mixture between The Huxtables and Rosanne.. We are a creative lot and have such silly fun 🙂

    • I love this combination–creative and silly are good things to be

      • When you spoke of the first night your son was home I got all misty eyed because my older daughter visits and it’s like that .. all cozy and lovely..then at breakfast well, the mess she

  17. Nice post. You put it into a very nice perspective. Thanks.

  18. Wow, you just took the words right out of my mouth!! I was feeling the same things this weekend, having Bryan home for the holidays. He even man-hugged his brother a couple of times :). We are a normal family too, so not every day is perfect, but I do cherish those special moments, and they make up for everything else. Here’s a question – do you find that your son actually seems to enjoy spending time with you now more than he did before he went away to college? I am definitely seeing a change in Bryan. He is loving his independence and doesn’t come home often, but when he does he actually wants to sit and talk with us much more than he used to. It’s a wonderful feeling :).

    • That is exactly what happens here too–it is nice to be visited isn’t it

      • Yes, it’s wonderful to be visited, and I’m enjoying Bryan’s hugs too because my youngest is at that age where he is just too cool to hug his Mommy :).

  19. Ups & down – moods, emotions & just different personalities. Overall – not so bad. But – some moments I can do without. I would think that it’s about how it goes for most people/families.

  20. Throw it all in a pot and family shows us our true colours. Yours seem solid, tried and true. Well done, Mom!

  21. As I get older, these little moments mean the most to me. I’m glad you spotted it and enjoyed it. Unscripted life is the best part.

    • unscripted works better doesn’t it–no expectations made or dashed

      • I find them more pure.

  22. I like how you “took note.” I try to do that, often. Sitting in a normal situation, and content, and saying to myself … “this is life. This is great. This is the memory of tomorrow.”

    • especially helps when you are having a rotten morning–like I am this morning

  23. I find those blissful moments so refreshing…and I want to hang on to them forever…but they don’t seem to happen through planning. I have to be calm and allow them to evolve of their own accord. 🙂 Glad you are having some peaceful time with your family all together!

    • some peaceful, some not so peaceful–typical family life – at least at my house

      • Ours, too, and I suspect everyone’s! 🙂

  24. When it’s just me and my son, the world is wonderful. I admit I hate to share him with anyone! Not his dad, stepdad, or his wife. I love it when it’s like he was all mine. I don’t care if it’s crazy, either!!! The last time we were alone, we ate and then sat by the fire and played scrabble and chatted. Just a boy and his adoring mom. Oh yeah he killed me in scrabble, too.

    • you so need that time to reconnect without everyone else creating noise and the fact that he is good at scrabble means you raised him well

      • Ha! He loves to beat me at any game. I won last time we played cos he said he “let me win”. He’s a funny guy.

  25. […] Family Life – You Gotta Love It! […]

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